Bergette Antonella

To my dear daughter,

The past year has been a struggle, and I have been trying to teach you academically, and it has been frustrating. But in the end, it was you who taught me. You showed me your independence and doing things your way. You learn at your own pace, and you know what you want. Your words, actions, and emotions have improved without me noticing them immediately.

Your level of understanding surprises me every day, and it makes me proud of how to compose yourself in every situation. Though I know you get frustrated once in a while, I can see that you try to manage your emotions the best that you can. There are times you need time, or you need constant reminders, and I give it to you. In the long run, you don't disappoint.

I can see your growth.

Happy birthday my darling.

Online classes struggle

 The struggle of online classes is real.

My daughter likes moving around since she practically grew up in the province where in she was allowed to run around, climb anywhere (with guidance of course), and exhaust herself to her limit.

She learns through play. And since the online classes are limited to video conferencing and given worksheets, my daughter is not interested. Don’t get me wrong, my daughter likes the idea of school, she just does not like the idea of school being at home.

She likes doodling, coloring and painting, but not tracing or writing (letters and numbers).

She knows her colors, but refuses to do worksheets, she likes using them on arts and crafts.

She knows her numbers, but on paper, she likes it when she plays hide and seek.

She likes building stuff from different toys and making stories with these toys, but is scared and shy of video calls.

She is caring, tender and helpful, but bashful and sensitive. I am fine with that.

My daughter’s sleeping habits have changed since the pandemic. At the end of the day, she still has so much stored energy that it takes time to tire her out, thus she sleeps later that her usual bedtime schedule.

The struggle of online class is added to my pile of worries and anxiety, but what can I do, this is the new normal.

I try my best to teach her, and I know she can do these things. I guess the home environment is really getting to her. I can’t blame her for that. Maybe play is her only way of compensating for not being able to go out for five months now.

This is totally different from the open area that she was used to when she was in the province. Even when we moved here in the city, we still found time to go out and walk around, explore our surroundings. Now with this new normal, she is practically a prisoner in her own house.

I am currently contemplating on asking help from my previous professors in my former school/work place who specialize in child education, because really, my daughter deserves more than I can offer her right now.

Ps. I just thought of something as I was ending this post. Asking for help from professionals for your kids’ education should be normalize and not looked down by others. There is a notion that if you ask help from professionals, that child is incapable of learning (or in Filipino culture “bobo”). When in truth, the form of learning may simply be different from how the child processes information, and that is okay.

Different learning styles, specially in early childhood education, should be normalized and understood by everyone.

First half of 2020

“What is the most useless material that was bought in 2019?

...

A 2020 Planner”

This... is partly true.

The ash fall from the eruption of Taal volcano at the first month of the year, shutdown establishments, highways and airports. Limiting most of our movements due to the air being unsafe.

We thought this was just a little bump at the start of the year. Everything seemed to have been back to normal after a few weeks - or so we thought.

Come March, everyone was forced to a lockdown/ community quarantine due to the pandemic. Half of the year has passed and some areas are still in community quarantine, though some business have been reopened, most areas still feel like ghost towns as there are only limited number of people allowed in establishments.

Wheeeeeww!!!! That was depressing.

To make things a little lighter, I would like to share what I am grateful for despite the first half of the year being unpleasant.

At the first two months of the year, my daughter was able to visit to at least one province from Luzon, Visayas and Mindanao.

Let me elaborate on that. We moved from Abra to Manila last October 2019. So our home base is now Manila.

So for the first day of January, my daughter and I were in the Province of Abra in Luzon.

A few weeks later, late January, we went to the Province of Zamboanga del Norte in Mindanao, with my husband who was on vacation. This is my husband’s province. We were there for about a week.

Mid- February, we went to the Province of Cebu in Visayas, to accompany my aunt who was visiting from Australia.

Despite the months after the being shitty, I look back and still feel grateful that my daughter and I were able to travel. Though, truthfully the only reason we were able to travel is because we had family matters to attend to.

What I am trying to say is, at least my daughter was able to see different places before she was home-locked due to the pandemic. 

It is within this first half of the year that I started to return to blogging and tried to revisit some of my forgotten hobbies. This is a work in progress.

That is all for now I guess.

I wonder what the other half of the year will be.

Till next time.

—- 

PS. There are other things that happened within the first half of the year, but these are family matter that I cannot share in my blog.

PSS. To those saying “ang yabang naman” or “check your privileges girl”...

I want to make it clear that the travel to different provinces were opportunities that I decided to take for my daughter to be able to see places. We don’t usually travel, it just happened that we had to go to these places and it happened that we had/ we were offered the resources for it.

I acknowledge the fact that we are one of the “lucky ones” who, despite the pandemic is still able to live comfortably. Though that does not mean that we don’t go out of our way to help in our small ways - we simply don’t post in public the kind of help we provide.

Busy June

June has always been a busy month for me.

At the first week of the month, we prepare for the nine-day novena to St. Anthony of Padua, he has been our family patron saint for the past 100 years. For nine days, we pray the rosary and the novena. For the previous three years, my father and I prepare a simple meal for those who attend the prayers, and on the ninth day, there would be an extravagant feast to celebrate the feast day of St Anthony. This year was different because I was not able to help in the preparation as I could not go to the province due to the pandemic. The novena was more solemn for me this year as I prayed with my mother.

Now, it also happened that my dear daughter was born on the very feast of St Anthony, so this in turn becomes a double celebration for my family. Despite the limitations due to the pandemic, we were still able to celebrate my daughter’s birthday with our family. My nieces were here to celebrate with their cousin. Preparations were a little nitty gritty - diy decorations, food and balloons - but I manages to pull it off and my daughter was ecstatic about it. 😊😊😊

At the end of the month, it my niece’s birthday. She is a year older than my daughter. Again, due to the pandemic, celebration was limited to just my niece, her sister and my daughter. I helped my sister prepare for my niece’s birthday - food and decorations.

I’m starting to think I might have a future in diy decors. Hehehe just kidding. 😝😝😝

June always seems to fly by so fast as I am constantly preparing for something.

This has got to be my most productive month for this year. 🤣🤣🤣

That’s all for now~

Bergette Antonella

Beautiful girl,

Expressive are your eyes.

Radiant is your smile, that

Gives great comfort to us.

Energetic and lively,

Truly you bring joy

To your family,

Elated, when with you.

Artistic and imaginative,

Naive and innocent.

Timid at times,

Often hiding  or shy. 

Naughty, only with your cousins.

Engaged in stories,

Love for adventures evident.

Little in size,

Amazing in actions.

This is my daughter,

Bergette Antonella.

6/13/2020

Ps. Link to my instagram for her Filipino-theme birthday celebration with her cousins. Due to the pandemic there was no big celebration, it was just a simple and enjoyable lunch for the kids.