Almost 11 years ago, I posted a letter to myself in this blog.
Honestly, I know that I posted it but didn't realize it has been (more than) 10 years since I posted it. It was only by chance that I decided to backtrack the post. Realizing it has been 10 years, I would like to take this opportunity to "reply" to my letter and post another one for my 33/34 year old self - hopefully I am still using this blog site 10 years from now.
Of course, the song that inspired these entries.
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To the me, ten years ago...
Dear Bea (22/23),
I don't know how to say this - We are content with what we have right now. But the happiness that we have been yearning for, we are not there yet my dear.
We haven't found our Oishi or Zukki, but we are married and we have a beautiful and amazing daughter.
We are have our small accomplishments, yet, we continue to "reach for a dream."
We haven't travelled to Japan nor Europe, but we will be moving to a different country with our family.
We will be meeting more people along the way, but our high school friends, will still be there to listen to us - specially Angeli and Lian.
Do you remember Edelyn? We will rekindle the friendship we have and she will play a major role in our future relationship. She will be our confidant and support. I warn you though, she will challenge us and make us question decisions in life, but this is for us to realize what you really want to happen in our life.
Remember our frustration in helping people in healthcare? We will have that opportunity but it's not how we thought it would be. This is definitely one of the highlights when we hit our 30s.
We will enter an intimate relationship and this will test us. There will be ups and downs like any relationship, and we will eventually make a family with him. But here me out, married life is not what we think it is.
The next few years will be a roller coaster for us and there are major life events that will change our perception of adulthood and life. The world will change due to a pandemic and we will make life decisions that will greatly affect our future. In jest, our life will revolve around our family, specifically our daughter.
The future is far from what we thought it would be.
We keep on going back to basics because we keep on getting lost. But don't fret, we always bounce back. We learn to appreciate smaller things and we are more humbled by events around us. We continue to believe in our abilities and skills, but we also learn how to celebrate in silence.
I don't want to dishearten you. The next years are still learning experiences for us. Stay strong, I can assure you, it will pass. You will see it through, hang in there, CHANGES are inevitable - just give yourself time to digest it all.
Stay true to yourself and before I forget, MUSIC will always be your salvation. You will hear more artists and they will also be your inspirations. LOVE YOURSELF my dear Beatriz.
That is all for now.
-Beatriz (33)
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To the me, ten years from now...
My dear Beatriz (43/44),
I learned that happiness has different levels, are we happy and content? Or are we finally happy like what we have been yearning for?
Are we still crying for the same reasons? Or are we crying tears of joy?
How far have we travelled? How many destinations have we visited? I hope we have reached the balance of home and travel we have been looking forward too?
How is Bergette? I hope we have prepared and guided her well for her future.
Are we able to protect those we value? Are we stronger and more cable?
I continue to quote some of the questions from the song:
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